Mature and intelligent Capricorn, represented in the zodiac by the goat, boasts a great sense of mental stability and many admirable qualities. (HA!) Capricorns, those admirable people born between December 22nd and January 19th, are practical, patient, forward thinking, confident individuals who carry with them a deep sense of purpose. (Seriously?) This ambitious earth sign is in store for quite a few surprises in 2012 along with one well deserved success after another. (Please say Yes!)

42.  It's arrived.  Not in full force, but it's here.  So, I do what I do.  You read.  Welcome to my 42nd year.

1.  I probably spend too much time on my computer. But somehow it seems appropriate.

2.  I have incredible boat etiquette.  Which is weird because we are not really boat people.

3."Hey, Mom."  is a phrase, introduction, beginning to a conversation, that I hear more than you can imagine.

4. Like Jason Derulo, if I were a popstar, I would be tempted to start every song I perform by yelling my name, "Jennifer Tyler!"

5.  Dinner is always a challenge.

6.  I strive to have handwriting like an architect.  In fact, I love creating my own fonts.  With pen and paper.

7.  I had dreams of being a lavender farmer.

8.  I get great pleasure from re-organizing a drawer.  Any drawer.  It gives me a sense of control.

9.   My favorite aisle in the grocery store is the cleaning product aisle.  There is always a new scent or product being introduced.  I'm a sucker for countertop spray.

10.  My children will all be taller than me and that makes me so happy.

11.  I fall asleep quite easily.

12.  I would love to have a small cottage decorated in a "shabby chic"  kind of way.  Like a playhouse but to scale for an adult.

13.  Moss is really beautiful.  I love the color and the way it feels.

14.  Speaking of moss, if I were a Smurf, which I would love to be, I would build my mushroom house on a moss patch.

15.  I DO NOT watch scary movies.  I just can't.

16.  Twitter has become my new challenge.  I am learning to use it slowly everyday.

17.  An emerald cut diamond is in my future.

18.  I love to watch my children swim.  They are amazing in the water.

19.  I should take some classes.  Photography.  Pottery.  Cooking. Accounting.  I need to continue learning.

20.  Planning parties is quite fun for me.  I tend to go overboard.

21.  See's Bordeaux candies make me smile.

22.  I like to be creative but at times I am embarassed by my creativity.  

23.  I never intend to make people feel inadequate.  That is one of the most hurtful things you could do.

24.  The numbers in my house address add up to 24.  I like that.

25.  I've often gone over in my head, "if my house was burning how would I get everything important to me out."  It's an awful thing to think about.

26.  At some point in my life, I would like to have a circus themed birthday party.  According to #26, I probably shouldn't plan it or elephants might be involved.

27.  My husband has become more handsome over the years.  He was a hottie when we got married.

28.  Sadly, I find some reality tv entertaining.  Hoarders.  Gross but totally entertaining.

29.  I love to dance.  Karaoke scares me. But I love to dance.

30.   I have no time for politics.  It pisses me off.  It's frustrating.  I think our government is a bunch of rich people who only give a shit about their own agenda.  Now you say, "NO DUH."

31.  I worry I will never be as successful as my parents.  Will my children feel the same?

32.  I only had 2 children when I was 32.

33.  I am proud of Here at the Hive.  I believe it's a nice representation of me.

34.  We feel lucky to have our parents around.  To have parents that are still living is a gift.  Mr. Handsome and I recognize this.

35.  I have met an amazing bunch of people.  In a weird turn of events I was invited to be part of the Snowmamas.  And in that, my life has changed.  in a great way! 

36.   I ordered a peppermint frappuchino the other day.  I drank half of it and then realized the calorie count.  The half I drank was delicious.

37.  When I was 13, I hated the idea of having boobs.  At 42, I love the idea of having boobs.  I will help my daughter feel the same way.

38.  Wind scares the shit out of me.  I. hate. wind.

39.  The ability to write a thank you note, actually write, with your own handwriting, is a dying art.  I insist that my children have that ability.

40.  It's the new 30?  Really?  That seems weird.  Why can't it just be 40.

41.  I feel more grown up this year.  I am easing into the new 30's.  I think by the time I'm the"new 39"  I'll have my 40's figured out.

42.  Being a little more selfish, it's what I'm considering as my gift to me.  I'll work on it.  But loving everyone around me, it's a priority.

Thanks for sharing today with me.  It make my day just what it should be, the very happy part of being alive.  Happy, Happy.

Change is what keeps us constantly striving to be more than we were before. Gettin' deep and not by going off the deep-end.

It's Spring here and I know because it's continuing to snow.  I have Spring Fever for sure and at the same time feel very stuck.  I've been feeling this way for awhile now.  And that rut, it just keeps getting deeper or I keep getting shorter and therefore it feels like there is no way out.  I do the same thing EVERY DAY.  Seriously, it really doesn't change.  I love routine but this has become torture.  I've decided to put it out there and maybe it will force me to make a change.

So with change in mind, I'd like to discuss a few things with you.  One topic at a time.  The first change I intend to make is regarding my body.  You guessed it,


I'M GETTING A BOOB JOB!

kidding.

As a person who is considered a cancer survivor, you would think I would have a real interest in my body.  Sheryl Crow wrote a cookbook because, as a cancer survivor, she realized she needed to consider how everything affects your body and your health.  People on a daily basis make lifestyle changes (green cleaning products for example)  for the sake of their health and well being.  I'm not like most people,  I instead have been secretly and subconsciously conducting my own form of warfare on the very body that I should be treating like a temple.

I eat poorly.  Not that I have twinkies for breakfast and McDonald's for lunch and then popcorn and beer for dinner, but I don't give a lot of thought to what it is I am shoving into my mouth.  I rarely consider portions, where my food came from, trying new things or eliminating things that probably aren't making me feel my best.

I do not speak kindly to or about my body.  Of course, a lot of the time I am just looking for a laugh.  But, if you say something enough you start to believe it.  I have a 13 year old daughter.  The LAST thing I should be doing is judging my body and only talking about what I feel is "wrong" with it.  Isn't that basic parenting 101?

I don't treat my body nicely.  I do take it out for a walk in the morning but that's only because the dogs can't walk themselves.  I do get out and enjoy the great outdoors but only if I'm guaranteed a beer afterwards.  I need to find something I like to do that gets my heart rate up and make it a part of my daily life.

Now, I know this can't happen overnight.  And, I know that I am only human and I won't always make the right choices.  But, thinking about it, saying it and then giving it the ol' college try can't hurt.

Another day we will be discussing "stuff."  Yes, "stuff."  The keeping, buying, storing, constant rearranging of and general downer that it brings.

Til then I'm off to eat a bowl of ice-cream and down it with a margarita.   Again, kidding.

Post- 40, Post -Christmas, Pre- New Year Rant

*This picture makes everything I say below go away. I love these boys. I love being their mama. How lucky am I? So f*^%ing lucky!

Life is all new for this 40 year old. I hate 40. I'll get over it. I'll be more positive. It's just going to take awhile. I was going to be that 40 year old who suddenly got it all together. She was physically-fit, financially-fit, emotionally-fit, creatively-fit, wake-up-in-the-morning-rocking-it-fit. I am SO not fit. On so many levels. It's pretty on the outside (okay maybe it's not) but inside, it's ugly. I'll take care of it. I take care of things. 2010. It's gonna be okay. I guarantee it. I'm working on it.

On a lighter note, we got great stuff for Christmas. Seriously great. The people in our life know how to buy gifts. It's something I wish I were better at doing. I make gifts. I'm that annoying friend, sister-in-law, aunt, sister, .....who makes gifts. I should stop. The gifts we got rocked.

Now, how do I get nine, eleven and four year olds to write THANK YOU notes? Threaten them with "Sit your ass down and write thank you notes?" They WILL write thank you notes.

*Mr. Handsome took offense to this, don't take offense, it's just a 40 year old spouting her mouth." Here it comes... super offensive.

It may kill this 40 year old but at least at my funeral, people will say "Her children wrote the nicest thank-you notes!" Did that offend? Hope not but if so, let me know. I can handle it.

This is my post-40, post-Christmas, pre-New-Year rant. I will be better, I promise. Much thanks to my new followers, my readers and my cute family. Thanks for tolerating me. I'm annoying, I know it. But, I've got stuff to talk about damn it.

40 things.

The Goat - Capricorn explained.
December 22 to January 20

Traditional
Capricorn Traits

Practical and prudent
Ambitious and disciplined
Patient and careful
Humorous and reserved

On the dark side....

Pessimistic and fatalistic
Miserly and grudging

I have a few things to say. I'm entitled. It's my birthday. I have 40 things I'd like to talk about. It may ramble. It may make sense, it may not. It's all important to me. Fasten your seat belts, it's about to begin. In no particular order.

1. I am really happy. Not every day, because no one is really happy EVERY day. But for the most part I am really happy.

2. My life has not turned out how I thought it would. I'm a dreamer, some things don't happen how we think they will.

3. I am still the same person I was 20 years ago, except I'm different.

4. I am silly most of the time. But I do get really serious and then it's.... well serious.

5. I have had my heart broken. Really broken. I think I'm lucky. When my children deal with this, I will understand.

6. I don't like to watch the same movie over and over. If I've seen it once, I've seen it. However, once convinced I will watch a movie for the second, third or fourth time.

7. I like fruitcake. I like my mom's fruitcake. She thinks I'm a fruitcake for liking her fruitcake.

8. I was a gymnast. I was a good gymnast. Then I was a swimmer, I was a really good swimmer. I loved being both. I loved being good.

9. Babysitter Casserole is one of my favorite recipes. My mom made it up. It involves ground beef, elbow macaroni and cream of mushroom soup. It is delicious and a family recipe.

10. I know my very best friend. Her name is Chris Brown. She is THE best friend I have ever had. And, I still know her. I met her when I was 5. 35 years ago. If I could see her today, she would make me laugh so hard I would spit milk in her face or out my nose. Either way, don't matter. I adore her.

11. I have been pregnant 4 times. The 2nd time was the worst. I didn't have a baby the second time. It broke my heart.

12. My brother is amazing. I have always been in awe of him. He is an amazing artist. Terrificly funny. Crack me up funny. He challenges our parents. I respect him and love him.

13. I love my sister-in-law. I know. Crazy, right? I love her. She is charming, beautiful and loves my brother. I'm lucky.

14. I love my other sister-in-law. She's married to my husband's oldest brother. I love her. She smart. She's funny. She respects me. I totally respect her. Together we will keep this thing moving. We will move mountains. She's amazing.

15. I love sour patch kids, hershey bars and twix. Yummy. Yummy. Yummy.

16. Movies I have enjoyed are, Nanny McPhee, Elf, The Hangover, Old School...... There have to be more, they'll show up late.

17. I wish I could sing. In front of a crowd. And dance.

18. I have danced, late at night with really good friends, to Madonna. And filmed it. And then watched it. And then laughed really loud. It was classic and fun and worth every minute of drunken-ess.

19. I know my sister. I don't have a sister. But I know who it would be if I had one. She is the most amazing woman I know. Her name is Geri. Her dad looks like my dad. Her mom is my other mom. I want to be Geri. I love her with all of my heart. She is smart, creative, generous and amazing. She is one of the greatest gifts I have ever received.

20. I LOVE MY HUSBAND! He drives me crazy, he makes me laugh, he loves me unconditionally, he gives me more than you can imagine. I LOVE HIM LIKE CRAZY.

21. I will eat cake batter out of the bowl. Without hesitation. Raw eggs. So what. I will eat cake batter out of the bowl.

22. Twenty two is my favorite number. It is the perfect number. I don't know why it just feels right.

23. Seagrams-7 and diet sprite is my drink of choice. I will also drink Bacardi and diet coke. Jose Cuervo and Crystal Light lemonade. Vodka and I don't know. I don't love wine or beer. But I won't turn it away.

24. I love the smell of lavender. I wish I could grow lavender. I live at high altitude. I can't grow lavender.

25. My children are my greatest achievements. I will not have a greater achievement. They are amazing. Every day they amaze me. They are smart, kind, beautiful and incredible. They will be outstanding adults.

26. I love my parents. They don't drive my crazy. I hope to be half the adult they both are. They have worked incredibly hard for what they have. I hope I can be like them.

27. I have no clue how to apply make-up. I so desperately want to have "smoky eyes" It just turns out a mess. Like rock star falls asleep in her make-up bad. Some day. Some day.

28. I have learned to hate. I hate that. But I do hate.

29. It takes huge effort to make me get out and do something. I throw a fit, find a bunch of stuff to do and then alphabetize something before I go outside and do something. Then I go outside and do something and I love it.

30. I am an enormous pain in the ass.

31. I rarely communicate with anyone from my high school years. I tried Facebook for a while. It did not bring out the best in me. It's ugly. It's silly. My husband brought that to my attention. See why I love him? He reminds me of the what is important.

32. I dream of being a farmer. I want to have chickens and goats and a garden of sorts. I cannot slaughter anything so I will have to be a vegetarian farmer or buy my meat at Costco. I would love to raise bees. I'm allergic to bees.

33. I buy things in bulk. Not just bulk but pallets. If I can buy a "lot" of something I will. A "pallet" bring it on. I should have been raised in another era or another religion.

34. My friend Laura, is remarkable. She is who I hope to be 28 years from now. I don't know how old Laura is so I'm assuming. You know about assuming. "It makes an ASS out of U and Me." I love what she loves, I love her. I feel really lucky to have her in my life.

35. I have owned quite a few pets in my life. From the pets at my house w/ parents...Samurai, my first cat that was mine. To animals we have owned into marriage and parenthood. I love them all. Jack, Sheba, Bojo, Hagen, Emma, Titus. Some are still with us, some are not. I hate losing them.

36. I have great friends. I have great friends who are parents to my kid's great friends. I score.

37. Hilary is adorable, loveable and smart. She has a great sense of style, I envy it. She is an amazing mom and SHE'S MY FRIEND.

38. LeeAnne is beautiful, fashionable and hilarious. She handles people like you wouldn't believe, she could be the First Lady. In fact, that's what I'm going to start calling her. She is an amazing mom and SHE'S MY FRIEND.

39. I'm crafty. Crazy crafty. I have a ton of craft material in my midst. I have pom-poms, fabric, glue, paste, adhesive, pins, thread, felt, paper, foam, paint, glitter, fringe, stamps, buttons, beads, you name it I've got it. And, by golly, I'm gonna use it.

40. I'm 40 and Holy Shit I'm going to shine. This is it folks. Look out. Here I come!