Our "staycation" has turned into a "suckation."

It's Spring Break here in Park City.  Most of our friends have headed to warmer, more tropical locales.  We are stuck here.  As part of my Snowmama gig, I am given a 5 day stay at the Park City Mountain Resort.  So for Spring Break, we decided on a "staycation."  The resort has extended it's season by a week so we are skiing for our break.  Well, only 4 of are skiing.

We arrived on Monday afternoon, very excited.  We are staying at the Silver Star condos.  They are luxurious.  There is a ski lift right out the door, pool, hot tub, gorgeous kitchen and condo accomodations.  Well, it turns out the lift out the door is not running anymore and the pool is closed too.  Uh, not a great way to start.


The boys were totally excited about the bunkbeds in their room.  Ladycakes has her own king size bed and private bathroom.  Awesome.  The kitchen has high end appliances that Mr. Handsome couldn't wait to get cooking on.  I must admit, I felt quite proud I could provide this mini-getaway for my family.

We had a lovely dinner on Monday evening and the kids hot tubbed and watched a movie.  Mr. Handsome and I hung out by the fireplace watching t.v.  Bedtime came along and I went in to tuck pj'd and teethbrushed boys.  I climbed up the bunkbed ladder to tuck Elvis in and in a matter of seconds the ladder was no longer under my feet.  I could feel myself falling backwards and grabbing for the rail but not making a connection.

Suddenly I felt myself crashing into the other bunk bed's ladder with my back and then bouncing from there to edge of the lower bunk.  All the while yelling, "HELP!"  I landed on my side on the floor with a horrible sharp pain in my lower back.  I couldn't move.   Mr. Handsome came running.  The boys, both shocked, were staring down at me from the top bunks.  I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.  It felt like I had broken my pelvis.

I spent yesterday at the ER being X-rayed and questioned.  No breaks, just really bad bruising, some muscle damage and some pain meds and muscle relaxers in hand.  Great friends came to our rescue to watch children while Mr. Handsome and I racked up charges at the hospital.  Then they came for dinner and provide the entertainment that we needed.  Even though I'm not very fun when I can't really move, they hung out.  We love our friends.

I can't ski.  I'm pissed.  My staycation sucks.  I'm sad.  I sent the family out today, to ski.  I am sitting in my luxury condo questioning it all.

Ugh.

PUMP. Please Understand My Pituation.

I mentioned that I wanted to discuss "stuff."  The accumulation of goods,  from clothing to toys to lamps to craft supplies.  Just stuff.  Here at the hive, we have a lot of stuff.  It seems to grow.  Stuffed animals are procreating in closets.  The sock draw is a hot bed of sock love.  A virtual swingers club for socks where I am noticing most couples end up single.

When I had the realization that a lot of my stuff is bringing me down, we had a sign.  A sign from the heavens.  Actually a sign from our gutters.  As Mr. Handsome headed down into our crawlspace to store just a little more "stuff,"  he stepped into 3 inches of water.  3 inches of water that is sitting atop plastic sheeting and then good old fashioned mud.  It's ugly.  It's messy.  It's not life threatening, but it's super annoying.




So this minor inconvenience got me thinking even more about stuff.  As I am pulling up pillows that I have been saving (why?)  frames that I've been saving (why?)  gift boxes I've been saving (why?)  I wonder why is it so hard to let go of stuff and why do we accumulate it?  I know there are reality shows out there that look into this.  I am not a hoarder.  But I am an average American.  There are 3 families (ours included) on our street that have a garage sale EVERY summer.  That is not okay.

I  have decided to work on what I purchase.  I am sick of buying junk.  I am going more high brow.  I want to buy things that I plan on having for a long time.  If I can't afford it now, I will wait until I can.  No longer substituting with something crappy just to fill a void, in other words stop hanging out at TJ Maxx or Walmart.   I think it will make my body feel lighter.  It will make my brain feel clearer.  It will make my house feel happier.  It will make my world feel healthier.



Now, off to use the pump I just bought from Home Depot.  Luckily this purchase is something we will have for a long time, hopefully we will only have to store it in the crawlspace with only a little  other stuff and it will be one of those purchases we never use but are so glad we made it.





Add "Pump up the Jam" by Technotronics to my Life Soundtrack because according to my friend Cal  "That's so you!"  Wow. and I know.

Change is what keeps us constantly striving to be more than we were before. Gettin' deep and not by going off the deep-end.

It's Spring here and I know because it's continuing to snow.  I have Spring Fever for sure and at the same time feel very stuck.  I've been feeling this way for awhile now.  And that rut, it just keeps getting deeper or I keep getting shorter and therefore it feels like there is no way out.  I do the same thing EVERY DAY.  Seriously, it really doesn't change.  I love routine but this has become torture.  I've decided to put it out there and maybe it will force me to make a change.

So with change in mind, I'd like to discuss a few things with you.  One topic at a time.  The first change I intend to make is regarding my body.  You guessed it,


I'M GETTING A BOOB JOB!

kidding.

As a person who is considered a cancer survivor, you would think I would have a real interest in my body.  Sheryl Crow wrote a cookbook because, as a cancer survivor, she realized she needed to consider how everything affects your body and your health.  People on a daily basis make lifestyle changes (green cleaning products for example)  for the sake of their health and well being.  I'm not like most people,  I instead have been secretly and subconsciously conducting my own form of warfare on the very body that I should be treating like a temple.

I eat poorly.  Not that I have twinkies for breakfast and McDonald's for lunch and then popcorn and beer for dinner, but I don't give a lot of thought to what it is I am shoving into my mouth.  I rarely consider portions, where my food came from, trying new things or eliminating things that probably aren't making me feel my best.

I do not speak kindly to or about my body.  Of course, a lot of the time I am just looking for a laugh.  But, if you say something enough you start to believe it.  I have a 13 year old daughter.  The LAST thing I should be doing is judging my body and only talking about what I feel is "wrong" with it.  Isn't that basic parenting 101?

I don't treat my body nicely.  I do take it out for a walk in the morning but that's only because the dogs can't walk themselves.  I do get out and enjoy the great outdoors but only if I'm guaranteed a beer afterwards.  I need to find something I like to do that gets my heart rate up and make it a part of my daily life.

Now, I know this can't happen overnight.  And, I know that I am only human and I won't always make the right choices.  But, thinking about it, saying it and then giving it the ol' college try can't hurt.

Another day we will be discussing "stuff."  Yes, "stuff."  The keeping, buying, storing, constant rearranging of and general downer that it brings.

Til then I'm off to eat a bowl of ice-cream and down it with a margarita.   Again, kidding.

Could you maybe make an announcement during the party and let everyone know I would have brought a gift but I was too busy thinking I was really cool and couldn't get it done in time but I swear if I had gotten it done in time everyone would have been super impressed. Okay, thanks.

Today I had a revelation.  Nothing religious, just a sudden thought that I understand myself a little better.  I am not one to have a lot of self-realization.  I kind of cruise through not paying much attention to myself.  Don't get me wrong, I tend to be self-critical.  But, self-searching and self-improvement are not high on my list.  Perhaps I'm lazy or dumb.

But today, today was different.  Today, I became aware of my Craft Confidence.  I am a terribly, almost foolishly, confident crafter.  I would prefer to refer to myself as an "artist" but that's when that self-critical monster rears her ugly head.

"How, Jen, did this amazing moment come to you?"  you ask.  Well thanks for asking.

Here's how it all went down.  I was invited to a baby shower.  I was told that the mother to be really only wanted diapers because she has everything she needs.  Diapers?  Really.  So boring.  I could construct a diaper cake, I could monogram diapers but I certainly can't give "just diapers."  Well, the hostess of said party knows I love to bust out the glue gun and fabric and glitter whenever possible.  She also secretly knew of my craft confidence and didn't tell me (perhaps she is my muse?)

So hostess says,  "You should totally make something for her."  :snicker, snicker, snicker:

It kicked in.  That warm, fuzzy, "you know you are RIGHT, I SHOULD make something for her" feeling.  And it started, my brain thinking "if I visualize it, it will come."

A MOBILE, that's it.  That can't be that hard.  I will construct a one of a kind mobile for this mother to be.  It will knock her socks off and she will be so glad that I didn't bring silly ol' diapers.

Fast forward to the day of the shower.  The mobile sat in my studio, totally not working.  Mobiles are really hard to make and I was sure I could get one done in a day.  Counterbalance, physics blah, blah, blah.

So I went to the shower empty handed.  This confident crafter ain't givin' in.  No way, no how.  I would give her NOTHING before I showed up there with an 84 pack of Pampers Swaddlers.

So today is a new day.  I know I'm a confident crafter, cuz I did it.  I made the mobile and I can't wait to hand it over to her.  And yell, "IN YOUR FACE!  I KNEW I COULD DO IT."




Wait, I will not say that to her.....

Birds on Branches 

Birds Hanging Straight on their Branches!

Crazy little birds......made by a crazy, I mean,  confident crafter.

Courtyard Marriott, Bacardi Rum and a Bromine burn. Plus, where the hell is Kerry?

Mr. Handsome and I had quite a weekend.  The children were involved.  The Utah State Swimming Championship took place and we endured all 3 and 1/2 days.  In Provo, Utah.  Go ahead, Google it, Provo, UT that is.

Mr. Handsome was a swimmer.  I was a swimmer.  We swam together in high school (the bullfrogs).  I saw him in a Speedo.  He saw me being a dork. (This all should be read to the tune of "Froggy went a courtin' and he did ride Uh huh." *my dad played guitar and sang this to us :special: )  Oddly enough, his Speedo and my dorkiness all happened in the same place 25 years ago.... Mr. Handsome has been re-living it more than I care to remember. (and no we weren't there in 1965!)



 We didn't fall in love in the pool but we both love the sport.  LoVe came later.....

Okay not about me or him... our children.   We spent the last 3 days watching our 2 Big swim like I have never swum.  Is swum a word?  Both of our kiddos showed a competitive spirit that is thrilling.  Maturity that is mind blowing.  Atheleticism that I envy.

Then there were the other parents, oy.  See her, in the picture above?  She's there in the back.  We LOVE her.  Not only do we love the sport, we love the team.  The kids are amazing, they cheer for each other, socialize, act like kids together.  The parents support ALL of the kids.  We cheer, we scream, we rejoice and we share disappointment together.  I dig these people,  we dig that lunatic in the picture above.

I cannot explain in words how proud I am of my children.  Little (Elvis) handled a very long weekend with grace and patience and a hell of a lot of "Zumba" juice.  Ladycakes rocks being 13....it's not easy in case you can't remember.  Q was a champion with a drive we enjoyed experiencing.  It was mind-blowing, watching your kid bring it.

My hope is that all Moms and Dads find something their kids love and they love too.  Lucky?  You bet we are.

That lady in the background....we love her!

It's not my fault so please don't trip.

I listen to XM Radio for a good portion of my day.  I'm in the car a lot and I tend to listen to the "20 on 20" more than I should.  It's a bit addictive and I end up singing along to songs that aren't really age appropriate.  I went through some old CD's today and I really should be listening to those.  LL Cool J, Luscious Jackson, R.E.M.  Instead I'm karyoke-ing to Miranda Cosgrove, Ready Set Woe, and yes, the occasional Lil' Wayne.

While driving with the family yesterday,  a song came on and I announced that it was my new "theme song."  Everybody shut up and listened to the lyrics.  Then all of a sudden, there was a huge burst of belly laughter from the back seats.  All three offspring were laughing hilariously.

I am so proud of my ability to make my children and myself laugh.  There is nothing funnier than making fun of yourself.  I happen to be really good at it.

Below is my new "Theme Song."  It's catchy.  Just try to not sing it to yourself, or do....... it will make feel silly and happy.  and maybe beautiful.






Add "Pretty Girl Rock" by Keri Hilson to my Life Soundtrack.

"I know it's 11:30 at night but I only have one more question" (and it's a doozy) says 10 year old son with more charm than whoever is the "most charming man" according to US weekly.

So we have been encountering questions.  With 3 children, questions come at us a mile a minute but lately I've actually been paying attention.  Not that I don't usually pay attention.  But "Mom, do we have any juice?" or "Mom, where are my underwear?"  are just not real questions anymore.  It's background music.


So a few questions Mr. Handsome and I have fielded in the last few days:

1.  "Mom, when are you going to get paid?"

2.  "How do boats catch on fire? They are on water."

3.  "Hey Mom?  When do you think you might have some money?"

4.  "Don't you think a fast skin swim suit might hurt my crotch?"

5.  " Mom. What's a condom?"

Uh, I don't know?  Might be the answer to ALL of the questions.  However, I do know what a condom is.  Mr. Handsome busted one out to answer this question ( and if you have been following for a year or so, we don't need these so yes, a new question is in the arena.)

6. "Mr. Handsome, why do you have condoms?"

Kidding, I was thrilled he had one and we did show it to Q and then made Ladycakes look at it, actually I threw it at her and she freaked out.  Then, we talked about it.  This is where I am....this is where I am.  Luckily, I kept my maturity in check and didn't make a dirty balloon animal out of the condom.  Mr.  Handsome and I need to talk......... :)