Saturday, September 14, 2013

Swanky. Swankiness. Swankiful.

We live in a swanky place.  I cannot, will not, shall not disagree.  Outside Magazine let the whole world know by naming my town as "The Best Town in America."  Thanks a lot A-holes.  Now everybody and their mother is moving here and there are 31students in my kid's 3rd grade class.  Wait... did I say that out loud?    I mean, it's a super great place and everybody should come visit once a year and then go back to their towns and tell their friends to VISIT.

Okay back to it's swankiness.... it's swankiful.  There are a lot of fancy hotels, high-end restaurants, expensive shops and some "rolling stock"  in town.  We also have a Walmart, a McDonald's and a Bed, Bath and Beyond.  So, our town is keeping it real, kind of.  Our neighborhood is modest and I love that. But, our "keeping it real"  is not really real.  Mr. Handsome and I are totally aware of that.  Our bees are living in a fantasy. It's apparent to us that they don't have a clue that the rest of the world looks different then we do.  Most of world doesn't get new stuff even when they need it.  A huge part of the world  doesn't have a full belly every night when they go to bed.  The bees got it good.

It's Homecoming at the High School.  Yep, high schoolers here are getting creative with candles and candy and poems and kittens (yes, kittens) and who knows what else to ask each other to what is sure to be the dance to end all dances.  Aren't all high school dances billed as that?  This year's Homecoming theme is Casino Royale.  Don't you just love it?  Because gambling for teens is so chic, because most 15-18 year olds totally understand Craps, because Sports Betting should be highly encouraged.

We asked Ladycakes what she thought about all of this since she is eligible for an asking. (Btw, just typing that made my stomach cramp up and I'm pretty sure I have hives on the back of my arms now.)  Her attitude is good, she doesn't care.  She's sitting back watching her friends get asked by boys  young men who are dorktastic and friends who are so desperately anxious to be asked that they themselves are becoming dorktastic.  It costs money to go to Homecoming.  It's being held at one of the fancy hotels I mentioned earlier.  Not the school gym, Heavens no.  We are talking 5 stars.  Frommer's, Zagat or whoever takes notice of these kind of things, well they've noticed this venue.

She explained that she could go as an individual for $30 and maybe a group of them could go.  It's $50 for a couple.  I'm thinking they need to get creative with their potential group and save themselves some money by breaking off into couples..... but I'm cheap and five bucks a piece seems like a lot of money.  Think of how much $5 gets you at Walmart or McDonald's or Bed, Bath and Beyond.....

However, this did get me thinking and you know what kind of trouble we can get into when the synapses are firing.  Oh, it can be dangerous.

The old anniversary is just around the corner.  It's a big one.  It NEEDS to be celebrated.  Luxury travel is not in the cards (we are not planners.)  However,  we could find ourselves at a LUXE hotel with gambling (which is generally illegal here in this state of ours, don't tell Outside magazine, they might change their vote.)  And all for FIFTY BUCKS!  Seems like a full on bargain to me.  I could get a new dress and Mr. Handsome could rent a tux.

Now if I could only get him to ask me to our anniversary dance with candles and candy and kittens and poems and a big old bottle of rum.  ahhh, rum.



1 comment:


Thanks Carol@ Songberries